White To Brown

I was at my local Walmart yesterday and noticed a woman ahead of me in line wearing very tight white capris. They appeared to be sprayed onto her butt, and her thong created a very deep indentation that was hard to ignore. She wiggled her butt as she chatted, creating quite a spectacle. Her pants were unzipped and her belly was hanging over the pants, which were digging into her flesh. I found myself wondering how she could even breathe. Everyone was looking at her, then looking at each other, smirking, and raising their eyebrows. She was talking very loudly to the other people in line and it was annoying, but that’s not the main event.

All of a sudden, I heard her fart very loudly, and instinctively stepped back, as did people in the neighboring line. An accompanying odor began to waft down the line. We watched in horror as a brown stain began to spread across the fabric of her pants. There is no way I would have attempted to take a picture of this disgusting sight.