A Reading From Coochielations
Finally all that standing to kneeling to back to standing I’ve done in church has turned out to be good training. “Piece of ass be with you.” “And with your spirit”. Unknown More
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Eat My Fart
Because nothing says “Don’t mess with this badass” like some emojis! Tennessee More
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Boobs On The Brain
Hey titface! You ol’ motorboatin son of a bitch, I thought that was you, how are you? I almost came right up and copped a feelski on ya! Unknown More
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Paper or Plastic?
They say you’re only as fast as the slowest member of your herd and I feel like this virus has really highlighted which humans are falling behind in the pack. Unknown More
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Distance Yourself
Our modern day Robert Frost… Unknown More
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Finish Him
She looks like a character you can pick in a Walmart Mortal Kombat video game. Unknown More
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Exclusive Club
Is this like a club somewhere? Are there any membership slots available? Asking for a friend…it’s me. I’m my friend. Unknown More
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The French Maid
Asked my wife to hire a French maid and boy did that backfire on me. Unknown More
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Hanes Her Way
You know, this whole mask thing is really pissing some people off. I mean, they are really losing their shit over this whole thing. It’s a big mess and I can see why some are causing a stink. Unknown More
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The Bread Man
If the crazy pigeon lady from Home Alone 2 is looking for a spouse I think I might have the perfect match. Unknown More
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Slightly ImPERV-fect
One of those sleepovers where you hope you’re the kid who actually doesn’t get invited… Unknown More
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